Kim's husband, Rod, says he lives with the loss every day. "There's always constant reminders," Rod said. "Someday, hopefully, it'll get easier - but not yet."
When Helene threatened western North Carolina, the Ashbys left their Sanford home for their mountain cabin in Elk Park, near Banner Elk, to make sure it would withstand the storm. That cabin was more than just a retreat - it was where the couple planned to spend retirement once Kim finished her career at Sanlee Middle School in Lee County.
"She was one year from retirement," Rod said.
Rod, along with construction crews, had built the cabin with flood gates, confident it could handle rising water. They obtained the certificate of occupancy for the cabin just two months before Helene. On the morning of September 27, 2024, he recalls watching the Elk River swell. "The water was coming through the garage exactly how it was supposed to. I told Kim, "We're fine, no worries." But moments later, he heard a crash. "I saw the outside wall lift off the foundation and told Kim, We've got to go now."
Rod says Kim and their three dogs tried to escape through a window, but before they could, the house was ripped from its foundation and swept into the river. Inside, Rod tried to keep Kim and the dogs safe on a floating bed as the house drifted downstream. A neighbor later captured video of the cabin floating away, unaware the couple was inside. The house struck an embankment. "I found myself underwater. When I was able to grab debris, I saw Kim about 20 feet ahead. I tried to pull her free, but the current took her one way and me another. I eventually managed to grab a tree and crawl out."
Rod survived, battered and brokenhearted. He searched for Kim every day afterward. For months, family, friends, search-and-rescue teams, and volunteers combed the area.
Kim's daughter, Jessica Meidinger, says they eventually found some of Kim's clothes buried beneath several feet of sediment. "That's why I feel even stronger, we're just not going to find her," Jessica said.
At Christmas, the family placed a decorated tree near the river where Kim was last seen. Jessica gave birth to Kim's grandson, Graham, that December. "She was opening the chapter of being a grandma," Jessica said. "It's really hard knowing she's not here to share those moments. In the times that mean the most, my first instinct is to call Mom."
The official search has since ended. The family held a celebration of life for Kim, and Rod has come to terms with the likelihood that she will never be found. "At this point, I just want her to have a resting place," Rod said. "I don't want her to be disturbed. I'd rather let her rest in peace." Rod says losing Kim has shifted his perspective. "You realize when you're standing on top of a mountain by yourself, what's really important. It's not the material things. It's your companion. I don't even remember the last words I said to her."
Through it all, the Ashby family expresses gratitude for the outpouring of support from their community. "Our family was given a lot of love," Jessica said. "But I know other families are still struggling. I hope they continue to get the love and attention they deserve."
Kim's body has not been found - nor have the couple's three dogs.
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