NEW YORK -- It's the third episode of this season of Paradise, but the start of Week 2. The women have the roses, and everyone is pretty much coupled up. However, that does not mean that all is well in Paradise.
Tanner, from Charity's season, is ready to build a connection with someone. He says he is most interested in meeting Kat (currently with Brayden) and Jess (currently with Blake). He makes his way down to the beach, and both Jess and Kat are excited when he pulls them for a chat. Tanner asks Kat out on the date, upsetting not only Brayden, but also Jess. Apparently, Jess had told Kat that Tanner was her #1 person she wanted to meet in Paradise. Kat did not have a conversation with Jess nor Brayden before heading out on her date with Tanner. She even went so far as to IGNORE Brayden when he told her she looked gorgeous. So, Jess and Brayden are both reasonably upset.
Tanner and Kat have a quintessential paradise date, riding horses on the beach. Tanner tells Kat there was never a doubt in his mind that he was going to take her on the date, even though he previously told Jesse that Jess was his #1. In a surprise to no one, Kat shares she is scared of horses, but she keeps her cool on their date. As they sit on the beach, Tanner says he is impressed by Kat's tenacity, and that it takes "a special kind of person to even do an experience like this."
If "an experience like this" is riding horses on a beach in Mexico, I would like to consider myself a "special kind of person." Tanner and Kat share a kiss, and it seems as though Brayden is not even a thought in her mind.
Brayden is understandably upset after Kat decides to go on the date with Tanner, and he is even more upset that she did not talk to him before she left. He says he is falling hard for Kat, and his gut tells him to stick his feet and the sand and just wait for her to return. He cries, he sighs, and he wears a blanket over his head in his confessional (none of which seems to calm him.)
While not technically a major plot point, I do think it is vital to mention Jess and Blake's conversation about his diet. Blake is an animal lover, and he shares with Jess that he only eats birds, no other meat. Jess is oddly perturbed by this confession and does not seem to understand. Blake explains he is referring to birds like chickens.
In response, Jess says, "I was literally thinking of a pigeon or something this whole time. What supermarket has a pigeon?"
Later on in the episode, Blake talks about the fact that the women are like murder birds that are found in Mexico. (I was not able to confirm the existence of murder birds, but the analogy is strong nonetheless.) Murder birds supposedly rip crabs' hearts out on the beach. (Stay tuned to see who gets their heart ripped out this episode.)
Aaron B. tells Eliza he does not want her to go on a date with anyone else, even though it is still early on in Paradise. Will is starting to fall for Mercedes after she brought him comfort during his breakup with Kylee. Sam is ready to get personal with Aaron S. (more on that later). Sean and Rachel seem to be developing a good connection. And, Aven and Kylee are all in on each other (for now). The only couple on the beach that seems to be surface-level is Pete and Olivia.
Tyler, from Rachel's (and Gabby's) season, arrives in Paradise. He was on the beach last year and left with Brittany, but it did not work out. That doesn't mean that Tyler isn't a catch though.
"He is dialed up. You could phone a friend from his abs," according to Aaron B., and many of the women are excited about his arrival.
Rachel, who sent Tyler home after his hometown date, seems genuinely excited to see her ex-boyfriend and says they have always had a flirty vibe together. Sean, an expert on body language, wonders if there is unfinished business between Rachel and Tyler, which to be honest, I hope there is. After Rachel and Tyler talk, he pulls Jess and then Mercedes. As the universe seemingly does not want Will to find love, Tyler asks Mercedes out on the date and she says yes.
Sam has gone nine days without a bowel movement in Paradise. She has tried everything from laxatives to changing her diet, and now the on-call physician must pay her a visit. It was kind of cute how Dr. Kelly Tenbrink pulled Sam for a chat when he came down to the beach, very Paradise of him, "Want to go somewhere and talk?"
"Bowel movements, they can be funny, but they can also be serious," Dr. Tenbrink said.
Once Sam reaches 10 days without clearing her system, he says she needs to start considering more drastic actions. By "drastic actions," Dr. Tenbrink says, Sam may have to be sedated so they can deliver a "poo baby." By sunrise the next day, Sam will have to leave Paradise if she does not clear her system.
Kat has not talked to Brayden since Tanner came down to the beach and asked her on a date, so Brayden decides to take matters into his own hands. Kat says that her feelings were different around Tanner than they were around Brayden, and that she does not see her feelings growing for Brayden anymore. This might be the roughest breakup we have had on Paradise yet this season. Brayden feels like there is no emotion behind Kat's voice and that earlier in the day they were red hot for each other, and now Kat has gone ice cold. Brayden thinks Kat played him so she could secure a rose.
Brayden is visibly upset after talking with Kat, and most of the men and women seem to be siding with him. Kylee and Jess, as Kat's friends, decide to pull her to better explain the situation. Kat is confused and frustrated by them confronting her, and pulls Brayden to talk again. "I shouldn't always have to tell you what is happening when it's happening," she said. "I have been nothing but open and honest with you." Olivia says that Hurricane Kat is brewing, and I can't help but wonder how Brooklyn would react if she was witness to this drama.
Tyler and Mercedes have an intimate "dinner" date, and as they are walking to their table they see a shooting star. Mercedes feels like it is a sign from the universe. She says that Tyler was #1 on her list coming into Paradise. Since Kylee and Mercedes are good friends, and Tyler and Aven are roommates, they could double date and hang out together outside of Paradise. Mercedes sees another "sign" from the universe: a raccoon. Their date ends with fireworks and lots of making out.
"I've never been so happy ever, in my life," she says, and your heart can't help but break for Will back on the beach.
When Mercedes returns to the beach, she pulls Will for a chat (I hope you are taking notes, Kat.) Mercedes is honest with Will and tells him that the date went well, but she says she has a lot to think about. She will sleep on it and let him know if she would like to pursue a relationship with Tyler, or continue a relationship with him. If Will's luck is any indication, Mercedes will move on from him, just as Kylee did. Wells attempts to give Will sound advice when he says, "Stop dating girls that want to go on dates with other guys."
After Wells tries to scare the poop out of her unsuccessfully, Sam decides to tell Aaron S. what is going on (or not going on.) After all, she has hours left before she may need to leave the beach. Truthfully, Aaron S. could not have been more of a team player in response. He says he has dealt with this kind of thing before, as he is a paramedic. He promises Sam the best night of her life, and that it will be both of their "poo baby." He prepares a "poo-poo platter" for Sam complete with coffee, olive oil, tacos, and beans. They also do some exercise together to try and flush out her system. Honestly, if Sam is able to go to the bathroom because of what Aaron S. did for her, the two of them deserve a date. As ridiculous as this plotline seems, it is a good example of what can happen outside of Paradise. Aaron S. showed up for her as a partner should.
"I might name the poop baby Hope," said Aaron S. "If this thing comes out, it is possible that the connection furthers."
Next week, we will find out whether or not Sam will be able to stay in Paradise. John Henry and John B., both from Charity's season, make their way to the beach. John Henry is interested in Kylee, and John B. is interested in Eliza. We will see if these two coupled-up women will give the Johns a chance! Also, we will learn what is inside the Paradise Truth Box. If the bonfire was any tell, I am sure what it contains will be dramatic.
"Bachelor in Paradise" airs Thursdays on ABC following "The Golden Bachelor."